Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Joke of the Day

Customer : Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter : Can’t you tell the difference by taste?
Customer : No, I can’t.
Waiter : Then does it really matter?

LOLOL


PS Who deleted Agnes?
PPS Speak Now is out!

JieMin4President

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Random: Top 10 Jokes #2

Hi fun/random blog-viewers,
Here's a fun/random joke rated #2...

A Illinois man left the snowballed streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife,whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor.
At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

Your Loving Husband.

PS. Sure is hot down here.

Source: http://www.4degreez.com/jokes/disp_jokes.mv?categ=&sort=n&jokex=943237916
Posted by: Ammonium

Friday, October 22, 2010

Addin' On

To add on to Ammonium's post...

NEGATIVE THINKING: See Mr Ng's face and all will be revealed.

Party till Tuesday! Be afraid, be very afraid! Not!

Random joke: YOU!

Random + Fun = ???

Ignore the title. This is random but not fun. :P

FUN TIME!

POSITIVE THINKING: It's finally over and it's time for FUN!!!

So...now on this fun blog, here's a random one-liner to start this 'fun'. For 'fun' only, seriously:
  • What if after two weeks, you show your results to your mother and she says: 'I am so happy/mad (depends) with your results I want to screw your mum!!!...Wait, I am your mum...' (continue the rest of the story by yourself...)
Get it? XD.

Neo Hong Afro (Guess Ammonium/NH4+ wouldn't be used much for now, right)

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Last burst of fire!

YEAH! After tomorrow, everything will be over! Come on! You can do it! Remember, after you come home tomorrow, 'Justin's jokes of the week' will be waiting for you!

Algebra Quiz - LOL!

The final papers...Math test. Fine, since that is a case, here's a math quiz on algebra...

Teacher: What is seven Q plus three Q?
Student: Ten Q.
Teacher: You are welcome.

Source: no. 9 of http://www.sonoma.edu/math/faculty/falbo/jokes.html.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Tickle My Mutton! 20.10.2010

One day John approaches his boss.

"Boss, tomorrow my wife is cleaning up the house. She needs me to be home to help her clean the carpet, then take down the curtain, then help cook. Tomorrow can take leave?"

"Sorry ah, John, we are very short-handed recently, I can't let you take leave"

"Wah thanks ah boss, I knew I could count on you!"

Adapted from Muttons on the Move

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Another Random Stereogram...

From Ammonium: Here's another random picture. Follow the guides carefully and it is definitely guaranteed to work :)...(at least its much more easier than the previous one, the previous guides don't work but this does)



Click the image to enlarge and click here for the answer to the hidden image.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Good Jokes Based on Clever Use of Language

Hi all who's viewing this blog,

Since Monday is the English Language Paper 1, here are some jokes on clever use of language from the source at the bottom of the post...


Good Jokes Based on Clever Use of Language:


1) A linguistics professor was lecturing his class one day.

'In English', he said, 'A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative.'

A loud voice from the back of the room piped up, 'Yeah, right.'

2) Robert went to his lawyer and said, 'I would like to make a will but I don't know exactly how to go about it.' The lawyer smiled at Robert and replied, 'Not a problem, leave it all to me.'

Robert looked somewhat upset and said, 'Well, I knew you were going to take a big portion, but I would like to leave a little to my family too!'

3) Two lawyers arrive at the pub and ordered a couple of drinks. They then take sandwiches from their briefcases and began to eat.

Seeing this, the angry publican approaches them and says, 'Excuse me, but you cannot eat your own sandwiches in here!'

The two look at each other, shrug and exchange sandwiches.

4) Brenda and Terry are going out for the evening. The last thing they do is put their cat out.

The taxi arrives, and as the couple walk out of the house, the cat scoots back in.

Terry returns inside to chase it out. Brenda, not wanting it known that the house would be empty, explains to the taxi driver, 'My husband is just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother.'

Several minutes later, an exhausted Terry arrives and climbs back into the taxi saying, 'Sorry I took so long, the stupid idiot was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger several times before I could get her to come out!'

5) A policeman spotted a jay walker and decided to challenge him, 'Why are you trying to cross here when there's a zebra crossing only 20 metres away?'

'Well,' replied the jay walker, 'I hope it's having better luck than me.'


Thank you S1-07 and have a nice day.

Source: http://www.guy-sports.com/jokes/good_jokes.htm

You can do it!!!

Hi S1-07,

Unable to concentrate? Here is a picture made for motivation,
(Just try to put your mouse over it, or just click on it for a try...)




Well, so good luck for EOYs again, this is probably going to be the post like this before the EOYs, so hurry up and go for the final and remaining effort for the 100%! You can do it!

From: S1-07 Ammonium

Autosterogram

Hi S1-07,

Just wondering if anyone knows how to see 3D autostereograms (a.k.a. magic eye). For your information, it is a type of stereogram, which includes, you know, the type where you have to put on 3D glasses? Well, here is something similar to wish you on before the exams below(Just that 3D glasses are NOT involved, just technique). To view the wishes for all of you, use the following steps:
  1. A guide is provided in the image. Try to cross your eyes until the two circles above the image meet (cross-eyed method)
  2. If using this method doesn't work, you can either
    1. Keep repeating step 1 again.
    2. Click on the image for a full-sized one (may be easier)
    3. Use the alternative method (wall-eyed method)
    4. Click on the 'Give-up' button below the image to see what really is the hidden image behind or to just check your answers.
    Refer to wikipedia's page on stereograms to find out more info and about how to see it by clicking here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autostereogram
  3. There are no more steps, you may start reading from step 1 again until you are happy with it XD.

So, here's the image below (Clicking on the image shows you a bigger image, lol):


Answers
Really unable to see the image, or just want to check the answers?
Here are two options:

Or...if you would like to find out more, just visit: http://en.wikipedia.org after the EOYs.

Anyways, still, after this post, Good Luck for the EOYs!!!

By: S1-07 Ammonium (aka NH4+)

Friday, October 15, 2010

Justin's jokes of the week

Joke Number 1:
What singer do bears like the most?

Katy Beary! (Katy Perry)

Joke Number 2:
Where do bears like to shop?

Bearagon! (Paragon)

Adapted from Muttons on the Move

Tickle My Mutton!

One day, an 8-year old boy went to the provision shop to buy laundry detergent. Being friendly, the owner asked him if he had to do a lot of laundry.

"No," answered the boy, "I'm using this to wash my dog" And with that, he took the detergent to the counter.

"But, this detergent is very powerful. You might kill your dog." However, he just wouldn't listen.

The following week, the boy was back to buy candy. The owner asked him about his dog.

" Oh it died"

"I told you the detergent would kill your dog"

"No, I think it was the spin cycle that killed it"

Adapted from Mutton on the Move

Sound or unsound advice?


1.Never get a tattoo done during an earthquake.
2.One good thing about mobile homes is that when it is on fire you can meet the fire engine halfway.
3.Don't take Diet Coke with Mentos.
4.When arguing with a stupid person,make sure he isn't doing the same.
5.To avoid scalding your hands in hot water,feel it by putting your hand in.
6.The nice thing about wearing boots is that your socks don't have to match.
7.In an undeveloped country,don't drink the water.In a developed country,don't breathe the air.
8.Look over the top of your glasses so that you won't wear the lenses out.
9.Ride the MRT during the rush hour and get your shirt pressed free.
10.Misers are not nice to live with,but they make wonderful ancestors.
11.If lightning strikes,make sure you are walking next to a tall person.
12.Tip for doctors:Just in case your patient has amnesia,collect the fee in advance.
13.He who sleeps with an itchy butt wakes up with smelly fingers.
14.When at a barber shop, ask for 1 inch and you'll either be extremely lucky or in deep trouble.

Relax, how?

Are you so tense you cannot study? Do you feel frustrated when you cannot remember something? Or maybe you want to study but you body refuses to obey? Well, your body's right -- under some circumstances.

You are just too tense maybe... Stare into the infinite sky for a while. Control your breathing -- breathing ≠ respiration. Visualise yourself having a flawless and relaxing revision. It helps. Sometimes speaking to yourself works too! Don't laugh. Doubt it for all I care.

Post 1!

One day Little Red Riding Hood (LRRH) went through the forest to look for her grandmother. On her way, she saw the Big Bad Wolf (BBW), who was squatting behind a log.

She went up to him and said, "My my Mr Wolf, what big eyes you have!" When the BBW heard her, he ran away. So LRRH walked on.

A while later, she saw the BBW again, this time behind a tree, so she said, "My my Mr Wolf, what big ears you have!" Upon hearing that, the BBW ran away again.

Miles later, she the the BBW again! But this time, he was behind a road sign. Just as LRRH was about to speak, the BBW shouted, "Little girl can you stop disturbing me, I'm trying to sh*t!


Taken from Muttons on the Move

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Welcome

Hi S1-07,

Welcome to the S1-07 fun page! Having too much homejoy? Take a break here now. Now, you may be wondering what this page is for. Well, for your information, the aim of this new blog for S1-07 is to relieve everyone of stress as EOYs are just around the corner now. In this blog, anything that benefits in relieving stress are allowed to be posted on this blog, as long as they help to relieve stress. For example, you may post a joke of the day, or just even any interesting widget on this blog to relieve stress.

To take part, just simply comment your blogger email in the comments section below and you will be able to edit this blog in 72 hrs.

Thank you S1-07 and have a nice day.
=D